The Wild Hunt
Original Air Date: Jan 24, 2014
Wyner C – Associate Staff Writer
“Come back in the evening, I’ll have the door locked to keep out the wild huntsmen.”
Hello Wesen lovers. It’s been a while. Wish I could say I’ve been hanging with a Grimm and seeing the Wesen of the world but, alas, real paying work got in the way of my Grimm recap and reviews. Since being in the 1% is still an unfulfilled dream, I had to forsake writing about my Monroe love. Now I’m back and ready to gush over my favorite Blutbad.
This is part one of a twofer. Sochi is cutting into my comeback! It’s okay, this one had it all – Monroe, not much Juliette, bloody gory scenes, and Hank/Nick time with an awesome well-timed yet inappropriate Sgt. Wu quip. Let’s get started on the Top 10 Wesen/Grimm list:
10. After researching extensively (I just clicked on the first link after Google-ing it), the quote is from “The Red Fairy Book” and the story is called “Brother and Sister.” Basically, an abused brother and sister ran away from their witch stepmother. The witch turned the brother into an animal after he couldn’t stand being thirsty. Boy has major impulse control issues because his sister warned him. The sister didn’t forsake his stupid behind but instead lived with him in an abandoned cabin. Then the king had a hunting party and the impulse control issue reared its ugly head. Brother just needed to go and join the hunt. Good thing he didn’t die, instead he led the king to the sister. Of course the king married the maiden. The witch couldn’t stand the new Queen’s happiness and killed her. Luckily, as a ghost, the Queen visited her newborn boy and the king acknowledged her. Pow, Queen is back and the witch dies – which breaks the brother’s curse. Yeah, whatever. I never get these stories. They seem so pointless most of the time.
9. There is a Wildesheir running around Portland, Grimm scalping men in uniform. Wildesheir are war-mongering Wesen that scalps their enemies and uses the memento to sew a cloak that they believe will give them the powers of the defeated. This is as disturbing to watch as it is to read. This show went there – scalping. They even showed the “cloak” – it was a poor man’s version of Balenciaga’s patchwork leather jacket (which apparently, they stole the idea but they have the lawyers to make you say otherwise). That scalp-jacket must funk!! Also, ew, he’s wearing scalps. Plus, if you look closely, the props people outdid themselves – I saw a patch of blond hair. Ugh, I think I threw up a little in my mouth. The Wildesheir is still on the loose and his next target is Nick. How do I know? The Wesen circled Nick’s head in red marker – like all master criminals do before they take down their prey. Cliché much?
8. Let’s get this out of the way. Juliette is still breathing – though she’s become less annoying (yeah?!?). Her new project (ie plotline to keep the actress employed) is to correspond with Nick’s mother through poorly coded emails. If someone is secretly reading the messages, it’s not hard to figure out “N” stands for “Nick”. I mean, you don’t need an Enigma Machine to break that genius code. I guess we’ll see Mama Grimm soon since this needs to go somewhere, right?
7. The show drags whenever Adalind and Vienna pops up on my screen. They need to end that ASAP. Adalind is having Rosemary’s baby – big deal. What did she expect if she’s been, on a daily basis, rubbing bloody magic remains of a Hexenbiest she helped kill on her tummy? Of course devil incarnate is gestating in your evil womb. Woman is only 6 months pregnant and her freaky spawn is already trying to high-five his mommy and eat its way out of her. Good thing about this? She’s about to give birth meaning the baby-selling storyline is going to end soon. Baby buyer wants Adalind to go into hiding and not a hospital because a doctor can’t help Adalind give birth. You know why? That child is going to rip his way out and Adalind doesn’t even know it.
6. Vienna happened too. Viktor tries to passive aggressively pry information about Sean’s visit to Vienna from Adalind. The only important thing that came out of the meeting? Viktor thinks the baby could either be Eric or Sean’s offspring. That brother banging slut!!! I like Adalind again after remembering that detail. Somehow, if they go on Maury and “Sean…You ARE the father!” happens, this is good news for Viktor and whatever convoluted scheme he’s cooking up. Also, Meisner has been spotted and noted by Adalind. Those two killers would make a pretty couple.
5. Nick and Hank is using La Biblioteca de Grimm to its fullest – finding Wildesheir all by their lonesome. After finding out the Wildesheir’s goal and his targets, we got this gem:
“Let me say, I’m glad we’re not wearing uniforms”
~ Hank, the truth-teller and realist.
4. How can you not love Sgt Wu? He keeps things light when he should be somber. He’s quick with the quips at the most inopportune moments. After viewing another scalped uniformed body, this awesomely funny (yet inappropriate) exchange happened:
Hank: Well, this killer’s definitely got an issue with authority
Sgt Wu: And hair.
~ I actually laughed out loud.
3. Monroe and Rosalee got engaged!!!! The proposal? In true Monroe fashion, he used a clock – a wooden bird exits the clock while the chime sings “will you marry me”. It was so adorbs!! It wasn’t a grand production and no YouTube video was posted but it was perfect – intimate and personal (as all proposals should be, if you ask for my binge-eating-single-woman’s opinion – yeah, no one asked, huh).
2. Monroe held off telling his parents about anything significant when it came to Rosalee. It seems his mommy and daddy are old-school and a bit eccentric. Daddy Monroe (Bart) doesn’t have a filter – asking about Rosalee’s age and income. Mommy Monroe (Alice) seems oddly too chipper. After telling them about his engagement (his parents were shocked he found anyone since he’s a perfectionist), Bart and Alice paid the newly engaged couple a visit. All seems nice except they didn’t know that Rosalee and Monroe were living together and Rosalee is a Fuchsbau. Yeah, procrastination has its consequences, Monroe.
1. Rosalee stormed out after meeting Monroe’s parents. She realized they were way old-school and bigots: they don’t like Blutbad cavorting with Fuchsbau (anti-cross-Wesen breeding bigotry?). It’s odd because Alice doesn’t look like a Blutbad. Maybe it’s carnivores mixing with non-carnivores? But Monroe is a vegetarian – do they know this? Anyway, Monroe’s parents were way rude so Rosalee left – telling Monroe it’s an issue he needs to resolve with his parents. I agree – she’s not the problem, they need to settle it without her. To make matters worse, guess who showed up unannounced for the umpteenth time?!! Nick! Or shall I say Grimm? Bart Woges and is ready to pounce!!! Poor Monroe – procrastination bit him in the behind!!! Also, this should teach Nick not to show up unannounced – Emily Post has a smug look on her face in etiquette heaven.
So folks, the next episode will be after the Sochi. I will not be watching the Olympics because I can guarantee you the layout of that programming will be: Profile, Commercial, Profile, Snippet of some sport, Commercial, Profile, Commercial, Profile, Commercial, Profile, Snippet of some sport, Commercial, Repeat. Will you watch the Olympics? I wonder how many Olympians are Wesen. Do you think any are Wesen? Well, see you after Sochi and let’s hope Nick doesn’t decapitate Bart’s head – it would get awkward in the trailer when he needs Monroe to translate, no?