New Year’s Eve
Original Air Date: Jan 9, 2013
Wyner C – Senior Reviewer
Ushering in a New Year can be bittersweet. It reminds you another year has passed, you’re a year older, there were dreams unfulfilled but it also holds hope – hope the coming year will be better, you will do better.
Jay has set up an “adults only” New Year’s celebration in Palm Springs. He had fun a few years ago (1974 – before I was even born!!) and wanted to share the fun with the family. When they arrive at Viejo Hotel Fiesta, they find it’s passed its prime. Jay’s gung-ho so everyone sticks it out and go to dinner with dear old dad. Gloria passes out during mealtime so Jay escorts her back to the room.
Claire/Phil and Mitchell/Cam takes advantage to bail on Jay/Gloria before dessert. Claire wants to have sex with Phil – they haven’t done the naughty for a whole month and she’s afraid they’re slowly becoming a sexless couple. They heed the advice of a dubious bellhop and skinny dip at a secluded spring – except that’s the location of the “Nude” Year’s Celebration. They end up in the water with a bunch of naked strangers…ewwww. Crabs, that was all I was thinking about – not the edible kind.
Mitch is feeling old – not making it to midnight last year. He and Cam decide to rock the New Year’s at a popular gay nightclub…to find out they’re too old for that scene. Instead, they head to a gay lounge/bar filled with old men where they’re the young hunks. They stay to bask in the admiration.
Jay gets invited to a poker game where he meets Billy Dee Williams. He’s having fun when Gloria finds him and demands her grapes. It’s a Colombian tradition to eat 12 grapes during New Year’s for 12 wishes. Billy Dee invites them to his house for fresh grapes because that’s what you do when you meet a celebrity on New Year’s Eve – you follow them home. Gloria gets her grapes, drives her dream car (owned by Billy) and celebrates New Year’s with Jay.
Haley is the babysitter (figurehead only – Alex is really in charge) for Luke, Manny, and Lily. Luke invites a girl over with another chick for Manny. Manny strikes out when he’s only friend material. Luke and his girl hole themselves up in his room making Haley and Alex uncomfortable. Haley resorts to using Claire-tactics (putting laundry away) to interrupt the make-out session and disinvite the girl. Haley starts to understand her mom – she’s growing up!! Unfortunately, the sisters are horrible babysitters – leaving Lily to monitor herself.
As the episode end, you can see that both the adults and children want to hold onto their youth – adults wanting to relive their glory years, the sisters wanting Luke to stay young (non-sexually active, thank you very much). It’s all the same – New Year’s make us look back at what was but we’ll always be hopeful for what will be.
Favorite moments/Things to ponder:
1. I just want Haley and Alex to know that Luke will always be their little brother. My younger brother is taller than me but I still call him my “little” brother because in my mind, he’s still the 12 y/o pintsize brat.
2. I want to know what crazy sexual scene Mitch/Cam encountered in the second nightclub. They totally Goldilocks the bars – first one was too young, second was too “OMG!!” and the third one was just right….
3. Truthfully, if I was Claire/Phil, I would totally just sift through the nasty clothes and leave – screw seeming rude. I mean, it’s unsanitary, right?!!! All that nakedness in one small hot petri dish…..
4. Who is dogsitting Stella?!!
5. How do you play “Hunger Games”? Do you really kill? If so, I want to nominate some players…
6. Best exchange of the episode:
Billy: Hi, I’m Billy Dee Williams.
Gloria: Hello, I’m Gloria “the” wife.
7. Quote(s) of the episode:
“Gosh, we should start calling her ranch house…because she doesn’t have a second story.”
~ Cam, describing Claire’s limited tales supply. Sounds rehearsed but Mitchell’s reaction sold it.
“You hate me now but someday you’ll thank me!!……I think I owe mom a huge apology”
~ Haley, finally understanding Claire. Growing up and seeing yourself differently is scary and embarrassing.
8. Family moment of the episode:
Haley and Alex watching Luke sleep. Creepy, yes, but they love their little bro and just want him to stay as a little boy. They’re like mothers looking at their babies sleep, wishing for more time before the babies leave the nest.
How did you spend your New Year’s? (Holding my dogs while scooping another spoonful of Chunky Monkey into my already full mouth – hey, Times Square ain’t got sh*t on Ben & Jerry – don’t judge) Did you make it to midnight? (I make it to midnight even on a school day – insomnia has its benefits) Does New Year’s make you feel old? Does it make you look back to yesteryears? Is it bittersweet? Do you feel melancholy or excitement? (Neither, ice cream numbs the soul) Discuss away!!!!