Night on the Sun
Original Air Date: Aug 8, 2010
Andi – Staff Writer
In which everyone is angry or gay or both. Eric is still a flippin Machiavellian mastermind, Lafayette’s mama is hilarious (“Aahhh! Jesus!”), Jason is just looking for more trouble than he knows what to do with and Hoyt was right – Crystal really was named after meth. And Bill and Sookie break up a little bit for a minute and then totally don’t.
Oh, Bon Temps, you weird little town. While Sookie’s in the hospital and Eric’s in Mississippi, Bon Temps is carrying on. Sam finds himself as his brother’s constant watchdog (pun intended) while Tommy tries to pick a fight with every single person he sees. So… when he isn’t forced to fight, he likes to fight? Arlene has a creepy dream about Rene (Hi Rene!) and hires a creepy waitress named Holly, who should play a part in next season’s main drama. Jason and Crystal have some couch sex after she breaks it off with her fiancé and seeks refuge with him. He then goes to Hotshot and tells her dad to back off and not to come looking for her, which is so stupid. It’s nice to have you back, stupid, impulsive Jason!
Lafayette’s mama shows up to explain that she has to protect him and his immense power from all the bad guys and she’s so awesome. Alfre Woodard rocks. She keeps flitting around like a crazy humming bird, occasionally brandishing knives and always saying Jee-zus instead of hay-soos. I love her. Lafayette calls Jesus to come get her and they have an interesting conversation about how mama Alfre isn’t wrong, which makes me think Jesus is a witch. This is just a guess, but given his name and the way this show likes to screw with things like religion, I’d bet he’s some kind of pagan ritualist. And then they kiss and make up! Aww!
As for Bill, he goes home to find Jessica so very happy to see him, but he’s just been dumped so he’s got his Edward Cullen hat on at the moment. He tells her that, as her maker, he releases her, but Jessica (Bless her!) won’t hear of it. He fails as a maker, she explains, because he didn’t teach her anything at all and now she’s lost and confused and she needs him. It is really sweet and cute and I had forgotten how much I enjoy these scenes with Jessica and Bill. They really are charming together. So, Bill runs her through some fighting drills, presumably because they’ve decided to protect Sookie when the weres and Russell come for her.
Sookie’s story line picks up on her screaming face, which sure happens a lot around here. She and Bill have a long, teary, melodramatic conversation about how they have to break up on account of how everything is always terrible. You know what? I disagree. I don’t really love this pairing but that’s because they’re too melodramatic and emotional and I find their level of self-tragedy difficult to swallow. However, Sookie’s “this has been one long fight” reasoning is kind of lame. Yeah, I get it, they’re representative of love and its many pains and struggles, but after everything they’ve dragged us through, they’re just going to cry at each other and place blame? Make it work or don’t, but Sookie can’t blame her relationship with Bill for all of the craziness that’s been happening; she’s neck deep in it on her own and it’s not entirely his fault. I know; I must be feeling ill.
Anyway. The love birds break up and Sookie goes home where Tara’s alternating between PTSD patient and awesome. Alcide does a damn decent job of making Sookie question herself because he’s big and sexy and no one blames her, probably not even Bill. Hadley shows up, sent by Eric to deliver a message, of course. She says to get the hell out of Dodge because Russell is coming and not to trust Bill, which is actually really good advice, but Sookie’s an idiot so she doesn’t take it. Hadley agrees on all counts and bolts almost as soon as she gets there. Debbie beats Russell to Sookie’s by a few minutes and they have a chick fight, while Bill and Jessica, who have shown up to help, dispatch the two werewolves that Debbie brought along for company. RIP Patrick Swayze’s brother!
Russell also shows up and Bill taunts him into a fight to save Jessica, but before Russell can kill Bill, he’s struck by the horrible feeling of his progeny and lover being staked! Noooo! Not Talbot!
After all of the were’s are gone and Russell’s flown away to try and kill himself a Viking, Bill finds Sookie and they make out and apologize and there are many I love yous and then they have angry sex. If Sookie was able, she’d be twisting Bill’s head around and crying. These people are a mess.
Eric, Eric, Eric. You naughty, brilliant boy. He’s returned to Mississippi with Russell instead of remaining in Shreveport because it’s better to keep your enemies closer and all that. Russell calls him out and accuses him of being untrustworthy so Eric gathers up all of his self control, kneels and explains that there has never been a leader as perfect and genius as Russell. Godric was a plebe and a weakling, he forces out, but not the king; the king is innovative and daring and strong. Skarsgard sells the hell out of everything tonight. Russell buys it because those are all the same things that Russell thinks about himself, but Talbot is PISSED about all of the bullshit that’s been suddenly dropped on him (the new live-in queen, the dead magister, etc) and demands to be appeased. Eric offers to keep him company while Russell is away procuring Ms. Stackhouse for his own nefarious purposes, which leads to the scene all of the slash fans had hernias over.
Eric and Talbot are on a date! They play chess, they chat, they get naked. It would be cute except for the part where we all know what he’s planning. Still, they do look nice naked, so I’m not complaining. Eric gets Talbot on his back (bow chicka bow wow) and instead of driving something else into him, Eric drives a stake right into Talbot’s heart! Poor Talbot. I liked him. “You took my family, now I take yours,” Eric says and all the way over in Bon Temps, Russell screams his black little heart out.