Family Guy – Recap & Review – We Love You, Conrad

photo: fox

Family Guy
We Love You, Conrad

Original Air Date: May 3, 2009

Thomas Nikl
thomas@thetwocentscorp.com

We’re back for another exciting episode of Family Guy. We have had a few straight weeks of Family Guy taking on complex social issues (pot, gay marriage, news media). Let’s see if Family Guy keeps the pot boiling. Come with me, readers!

Remember that stupid chick Brian was dating a few seasons back- Jillian? Well, turns out she’s getting married but Brian wasn’t invited to the wedding and he’s a bit upset. Jillian even asks Peter to give her away at her wedding because her Dad passed away. To prove Brian is over Jillian, Brian and Stewie go on a date with Derek and Jillian. Turns out Derek is basically awesome (speaks French, catches wine glasses, etc) and Brian is feeling kind of bummed. He gets drunk at a local bar and hooks up with some chick- but the chick turns out to be Lauren Conrad (from “The Hills”).

Brian is trying to get away before the paparazzi arrive but Stewie sees them across the street. Stewie is apparently a huge fan of “The Hills” so Lauren takes Brian and Stewie on set. Spencer is apparently (secretly) the guy from Planet of the Apes. And apparently they only have about five seconds of footage that they actually use on the show. Brian spills the beans to TMZ and the family is making tons of fun of Brian. Then they cut to late night TV hosts all making fun of Brian for dating Lauren (it’s the real comedians doing special bits for the show- awesome).

Brian is discouraged and decides to dump her for being an idiot who is only famous for being famous. He goes to her house to let her down easily but it turns out she’s all sophisticated and intellectual. She’s playing the violin, and quoting philosophy, does bimolecular research in her own lab, etc. Lauren explains the stupid is just a gig because it keeps the show on air (queue a hilarious Bush joke- man, I can never get enough of those).

Brian invites Lauren over for dinner and it goes pretty well. Soon Lauren is over shadowing Brian as the “smartest guy in the room” and Brain is getting awfully defense about it. But Brian realizes that he is actually just still in love with Jillian. Lauren and Stewie help devise a plan to win Jillian back- so Stewie dresses up as a woman and takes Brian out on a date. Stewie thinks this will make Jillian jealous. LOL. OMG. Stewie’s closeted homosexuality is so amazing. That doesn’t work so Lauren says Brian should go for broke and express her love in a way she can’t possibly deny.

It’s time for the wedding. The bride and groom are at the church altar. Brian busts in. He expresses his love for Jillian and asks her to take him back. And she says no. So the wedding goes on. Brian gets drunk. And that’s that. Poor Brian. Oh, and Brian apparently gave Lauren worms, too. LOL.

Best quotes:
Brian: “This doesn’t make any sense- if you’re so smart why do you hide it?”
Lauren: “Come on, Brian, you know America doesn’t like smart people- they elected Bush- twice.
Brian: “Well, once, but…”

Stewie: “Hey do you need a gay friend do you need a friend on the show” (to Lauren Conrad)

Lauren: “It’s Ok. They fill the rest with street signs, and fronts of restaurants, and old footage from the A-Team”